Tag Archives: killmail

Shit of the Week: Redux 1

I decided to take the wonderful “Shit of the Week” post from Aiden, and have a little bit of fun. I spent a few million (ok, near 16) and fit the Swiss-Army Hurricane with the fitting details. Trying my best to alter nothing and to keep it as true to the original fitting as possible. Here is what I went with:

[Hurricane, Jack of All Trades]

Damage Control I
Beta Hull Mod Nanofiber Structure
Warp Core Stabilizer I
Small Automated Carapace Restoration

Explosive Deflection Amplifier I
Limited Kinetic Deflection Field I
10mn Afterburner I
Republic Fleet Medium Shield Extender

200mm Vulcan AutoCannon I, Arch Angel EMP M
Civilian Gatling AutoCannon, Phased Plasma S
Experimental SV-2000 Rapid Light Missile Launcher, Mjolnir Light Missile
Medium Remote Armor Repair System I
‘Limos’ Rocket Launcher I, no charge
250mm Light Carbine Howitzer I, no charge
Upgraded ‘Malkuth” Heavy Assault Missile Launcher I, no charge

Infiltrator I x2

I decided to post my location and a bounty of 10,000,000 ISK on my own head, to see if I could stir up some pew pew against this awesome jack of all trades fit. I undocked from Dodixie and made my way into lowsec, ending up in the Aeschee system. I had to dock for the night, but returned this afternoon; blasting my location out there on the twitters and getting a few RTs, etc…

Shortly, and unrelated to the tweets, I blew up, while at a gate. I had started to just simply do missions, playing it “safe” and waiting it out… hoping someone would scan me down.

I died in a quickly destroyed ball of fire and managed to get my pod out of there. In opening a conversation with the killer, he noted my fitting was… interesting. I told him of the prize, the tweets, and the posts and sent him and the other involved party 10 Million each.

I enjoyed the bit of interesting fun and look forward to Aiden posting another Shit Fit for me to use, destroy, and laugh about.

Now, I’m off to drink a lot more, scam some courier contracts and cause general mayhem.


…no, it fucking wasn’t…

Says the recently destroyed Retriever owner, after I opened a conversation window and asked for a 5 Mil bounty. It’s always nice to get a bounty from someone when they are only a corp/game member for a few days, and have such an expensive ship.

Then to remind them of the first rule of EVE. Trust isn’t for sale.

[01:23:08] Gilbert Hamilton > Can I help you, Sir?

Note: I opened the convo, lately I just like starting out the communication as if they started talking to me, first. Shrug.

[01:23:10] Tanniss Majere > your cool picking on brand new players
[01:23:15] Gilbert Hamilton > Brand new? Not really.
[01:23:22] Tanniss Majere > 2 weeks
[01:23:24] Gilbert Hamilton > Nice ship. Current market value has it at well over a few million.
[01:23:27] Tanniss Majere > ill give u money
[01:23:34] Gilbert Hamilton > 5 million. 10 seconds.
[01:23:39] Tanniss Majere > k
[01:23:45] Tanniss Majere > promise u will leave?
[01:23:48] Gilbert Hamilton > naturally.
[01:23:56] Gilbert Hamilton > You can contact my CEO if you wish. 5 seconds.
[01:24:09] Tanniss Majere > there
[01:24:10] Gilbert Hamilton > Thank you, sir.
[01:24:18] Gilbert Hamilton > That covers the ammo.
[01:24:22] Tanniss Majere > yeah im done with this game
[01:24:29] Tanniss Majere > just started woiw
[01:24:31] Tanniss Majere > thanks
[01:24:33] Gilbert Hamilton > Never trust anyone.
[01:24:36] Gilbert Hamilton > Welcome to EVE
[01:24:37] Tanniss Majere > now i have nothing
[01:24:39] Tanniss Majere > no ship
[01:24:41] Tanniss Majere > no money
[01:24:49] Gilbert Hamilton > You do. your ship was insured.
[01:25:05] Tanniss Majere > no it fucking wasnt
[01:25:07] Tanniss Majere > yeah 40%
[01:25:18] Gilbert Hamilton > Lesson learned, I suppose. Fly safe, sir!
[01:25:24] Tanniss Majere > fuck u i hope u die
[01:25:29] Gilbert Hamilton > Will do.
[01:25:30] Gilbert Hamilton > o/

Gil’s Tip #2

Tip two, because I assume I’ve tipped before. I’m a good tipper. Forget what the waitress said. In today’s roam with my alt, I came across a Catalyst and decided to take it out via suicide. The story follows.

[00:17:48] Cp Markus > lols
[00:24:39] Cp Markus > how long does it take to blow up a pod???
[00:25:59] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > **posted killmail**
[00:26:05] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > dunno, I just blew one up in short order.
[00:26:31] Cp Markus > lol bragging about newb kills is for pussies
[00:26:43] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > It’s just easier when getting my sec status lowered.
[00:26:44] Cercis InoAtari > vaginas? where?
[00:26:46] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > Also, he wasn’t a newb.
[00:27:00] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > I kid. OF COURSE HE WAS!
[00:27:27] Cp Markus > lol says the dude hiding in a station lols
[00:28:05] Cp Markus > hey he’s back out here in another catalyst lols
[00:28:53] Cp Markus > I’ll give you 20 mil if you can do it again lol
[00:29:15] EPIC Immortal’s > ya come out now bro

This was the guy just took the catalyst from

[00:29:39] Cp Markus > Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt vs epic…… hmmm my money is on epic
[00:32:09] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > what system?
[00:32:12] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > erm belt.
[00:32:26] Cp Markus > the first one
[00:33:26] Cp Markus > lols target jammers eh?

[00:33:35] Cp Markus > hold on he’s on his way

Apparently this Cp guy, who’s been around since early 2011, doesn’t know which chat window to type into…
He targets me with his ship. A drake. Then proceeds to get himself slain by CONCORD because he decided to just up and shoot me. I suppose he could have mde the mistake, but I’d like to think betting on stupid paid off this time.

[00:34:14] Cp Markus > hmmm……

Yeap, it would seem, it does.

[00:35:03] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > lol. CP Markus just got himself CONCORDED
[00:35:20] Cp Markus > dont bother me lol
[00:35:50] Cp Markus > ship for ship
[00:37:42] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > Oh, CP….
[00:37:56] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > –I return in the newb ship, take his stuff, then link his stuff in local– etc…
[00:37:58] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > thanks for the stuff.
[00:38:13] Cp Markus > lol its cool, just figured you can have a merry christmas
[00:38:18] Cp Markus > i can get it back no problem
[00:39:37] Cp Markus > you know whats really funny…. is watching my alliance slam you (:

Oh, alliance chat. Good. I open a chat convo. Hoping to gather more tears, and hoping for a wardec on this shit lazy empty corp I am in, before I jump out of it into another nullsec corp I am going to try to sneak into. (An earlier chat convo was had about that, prior to this stuff in local. Here’s to my next target.)

Chat Convo…

[00:40:33] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > o/
[00:40:41] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > Don’t bother salvage – it’s gone too.
[00:40:49] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > But I can contract the fields to you if you’d like.
[00:40:54] Cp Markus > lol you think i care????
[00:41:00] Cp Markus > hmmm nah
[00:41:06] Cp Markus > I’ve got plenty lol
[00:41:12] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > You’re so vain. You probably think this song is about you.
[00:41:16] Cp Markus > scammers and pussies dont bother me
[00:41:33] Cp Markus > its a game bro, i was gonna lose that drake and that shit anyways
[00:41:55] Cp Markus > i just went ship for ship. but you scooted out like a bitch, so its all good (:
[00:41:58] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > of course you were. as I was going to lose my cat and the sec status. ;)
[00:42:27] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > Well, the folks at TC-26 say thank you for your time, energy, and most of all… tears.
[00:42:40] Cp Markus > lol no tears for queers.
[00:43:01] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > So you’re saying you’re not crying, or you’re gay? I don’t understand, but do have the strangest erection.
[00:43:43] Cp Markus > im definitely not a queer… lols,
[00:44:07] Gilbert Hamilton’s Alt > Darn. Well fly safe then. o/

I realized it’s not that bad…

Today’s loss of ship and the resulting loss of pod. Most of my ships are either stolen or otherwise grabbed. The amount wasn’t too bad, but I did have a bit of a “oh poop. that’ll take some market work to repair,” feeling come across me.

Either way, those Negative Ten guys had a very efficient gate camp. I’ll take less shortcuts around the Hek area from now on. Or bring friends.

Naturally, it was a trap.

Can’t say I wasn’t hoping it wasn’t a trap, but I knew it was based on the number of corp mates in the area, cans, etc. But I still walked right into it. That Crow was a nice and fast boat, and I enjoyed the fight. My conversation with him, after losing my Jaguar to him, follows.

[02:30:55] Gilbert Hamilton > gf. never even used a crow – loved the fight against it.
[02:31:03] Gilbert Hamilton > was a tasty chase.
[02:31:11] Donnie Supertramp > haha, ty
[02:31:42] Gilbert Hamilton > I’m going to have to look into that ship – hella fast, it was.
[02:31:53] Gilbert Hamilton > what was the other ship? a missile boat?
[02:32:13] Donnie Supertramp > nah falcon
[02:32:22] Gilbert Hamilton > oh yeah, ok that’s what it was. nice.
[02:32:25] Gilbert Hamilton > anyway, gl and fly safe.
[02:32:26] Gilbert Hamilton > o/
[02:32:31] Donnie Supertramp > ty, gf

I always enjoy a good conversation after a fight – as little as it was, really. Unless I’m the one going for tears, of course. Now to puff up my manhood and piss off someone weaker than I. Naturally.

Hound is down…

Lost the Hound today, to a bit of a game – so to speak. I arrived into a mission piloted by a Raven, a Fed Navy Comet, and a Noctis. Naturally, I started stealing.

To start, I wasn’t in my Hound. I was in my Vigil, doing the usual steal/salvage thing. I haven’t been in a fight in a long time, and was hoping they would shoot. So, they did and I enjoyed that. Returning in my Dramiel, didn’t do much but get me some drone-killing practice against his full flight of T2 drones. A few minutes later, I returned in my Wolf. The drones went down fast, but I couldn’t crack his Raven’s shields. Having exactly no experience against a Raven, and very little pvp overall – I was enjoying trying a few different things out.

Soon, I had to return to repair. While doing that, I waited the 15 minute aggro timer out, and then returned in the Hound. Sitting cloaked a little bit away from the acceleration gate, I waited for the Raven and the Noctis to warp off into the next room. The Comet stayed behind, and I was able to get him down into armor. But soon, my Hound popped and I warped off, tail between my legs.

Lesson learned – I hate drones. Hate them. Lesson two: the Hound is not good for close quarters stuff, and would fit me better in a fleet.

Weekend Fun

Memorial Day weekend was fun – I did the expected family stuff and rested a lot. Then, spent some time with my Ninjas. I ended up getting involved in a fleet op *just* a little bit too late. In fact, I was able to convince the Dominix pilot to shoot me (seriously: via chat) but just as he did, he already had died. So I couldn’t sneak my way into the mail. I didn’t have mumble, so I couldn’t keep up with much of the details so I cut that short.

The alt is in another corp. A new, fresh corp. Which is good and bad. On the infiltration things – it’s bad because there is nothing there for me to steal yet. But on a good note, if I behave and just leave because “real life is keeping me away, etc.” or something on a good note, it’s a good reference for the next guy should I say I don’t agree to an API check and give references instead.

The night ended with a lesson for a newbie: *never* ignore the “don’t steal this” warning.